Over 9 years ago I was sitting in my living room in Missouri (or misery) watching Stars Wars Episode I on DVD. As I was watching the behind the scenes I started to feel an itch. Being 24 at the time I couldn't quite place my finger on what it was, but the more I watched the DVD the more I came to realize that the itch was the metaphoric acting bug. I'm not talking a nibble. I was bitten full on by this newfound notion that has eluded me all of these years. This actually wasn't the first time I felt this... but it definitely was the most memorable.
3 years earlier while in college I was in a film class. That is the first I felt the inclination to go to Hollywood and start my acting career. Problem was my daughter was just about to be born so I quickly put that notion on hold. The next year we found out we had another little one coming and by 2000 my son came along to grace this world. I was a very proud father and felt like a man for the first time in my life. I had my own 4 bedroom home purchased with a double lot field around us and aspirations to build a brand new home from scratch nearby. 2000 was also the year that I found my own ebay business and was off and running.
Fastforward back to Oct 2001. After watching the whole Star Wars DVD I went to my office and immediately started researching. By the time my wife came home from work I couldn't wait to tell her that acting was the profession I had to be in. It made perfect sense. Everything I have ever went through in my life seemed to lead up to that moment and it was time for me to take full advantage of it. Of course she was a little hesitant but supportive. But when she came home the following day and I hit her with "...and we are moving to California", she freaked. It took some convincing but she eventually warmed to the idea.
I immediately starting fixing my hair again (like I use to when I was younger) and shaved... no more scruffies. Within a few weeks I ended up flying to Los Angeles by myself to scout the area. There I got my first headshots done for $50 (black and white), and auditioned for my first role. Okay it was a cattle call for Austin Powers: Goldmember but I had fun. I also paid a visit to the Jay Leno show and just familiarized myself with the whole LA scene.
I was quite surprised when I returned back home to hear that the people for Austin Powers called and wanted to know if I could come in again. I forgot I put my in-laws phone # on the audition and when they asked my mother-in-law what area we were in because they didn't recognize the area code she told them Missouri. They ended the conversation with "Well, I guess he can't make it here by tomorrow then" and hung up. When I heard this upon arriving back home I was upset... but happy at the same time that I was considered on my first audition.
I quickly put my house up on the market and waited for an offer. Over the next year I received two more calls for auditions (which I submitted with my new headshots from Missouri) and each time I drove the 24 hours to get there. One was for a new tv show pilot and he liked my look, but was put off by me not living in LA. I knew I had to get my butt there somehow.
Finally we found a buyer. We sold the house, made some money off the deal and moved to... you guessed it.. Kansas City. Wait... what? I know you are confused. But I was actually concerned that my wife would not adjust that quickly to city life in LA since she is from a small town and I wanted to give her a step up for a few months before making the big move. What a great and thoughtful guy I am! So we signed a 6 month lease, she found a job, said goodbye to her parents and we left.
As promised we made the move in May of 2003 to Van Nuys, CA. Within a month I got new color headshots and found an acting class. Within 2 months I was audioning for everything I could get my hands on. Within 6 months I landed a SAG commercial that taft-hartley'd me into the union. And within a year I had my own manager and agent. My first year here was going better than expected and I was doing it... I was an actor.
Over the next couple of years I went through 3 different agents, 2 acting schools, a stint on a soap opera, and a line in the new Star Trek film. I also produced a few of my own film projects after buying my own equipement (camera, lights, track dolly, sound, editing, you name it). But it just wasn't fun for me anymore. I was now 30 years old and I was starting to over analyze myself too much. I decided to take a break for awhile and work on my photography full time.
On and off over the past 3 years I have felt that comeback bug in me... but realizing how hard it was the first time around I decided to hold off until I was fully consumed by it again and ready to take on the world. That feeling still hasn't hit me yet. And even though I have done some acting over the past year or so, it was because of previous work I've done and not me auditioning like I did before.
For now I am very happy with where my photography has taken me. I have taken several trips across the world and have enjoyed my last 3 years of not worrying too much about my appearance. But that "what if" question every now and then comes back in my head. The truth is I never really wanted to be a star... only have the prestige to say I was a working actor. I feel the time may be coming closer to where I update my headshots and test the auditioning waters for a second go-round. But again, I've been saying that for the past 3 years.
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