It's been about eight years since I wrote my last feature length movie script. I shopped it around a few times but mainly it has just been collecting dust on my shelf. Shortly after writing I had this awesome idea for another one but was too burnt out to write it. Lately, I have had that itch to at least get it started. I waited so long because it's a historical piece that deals with a ton (and I mean A TON) of research to get it right. I've always felt a bit intimidated I guess to take it on but the idea is just one of those once in a lifetime no brainers that I have to write it.
It is set back in the year ???? and deals with humanity as we strive to overcome the ????? ????????? and build ??????? back to how it ??? ?? ??. I don't know how I can be any more clearer than that.
The story line is simple but it involves real events which makes this the more difficult to write. But if I can just get the concept down and take my time on it then I feel this is definitely a movie that can be made. I already have a director in mind who would be perfect for it. It may take me quite some time to get this done but speed is not my objective. If it takes two years then so be it. I'm tired of this idea rattling around in my head. I'm just surprised that I have not heard this mentioned at all in the Hollywood circles and because of that I am keeping all of the details to myself. I already know this is a million dollar script and I don't need to tell anyone for reassurance. And even if the first or second draft sucks, I know the plot line would be good enough to gather some interest for a rewrite.
I don't know if I will ever consider myself a script writer, even if this does get picked up. But I have always had a knack for writing and storytelling so who knows. The best feeling is just having a goal in mind to accomplish and not let fear dictate my accomplishments. I've searched my life for that OH SHIT idea and now that it's in front of me I will not let it slip through my fingers.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Moving to Europe- The Dream Has Begun
Yesterday I may have planted the seed that will forever change my direction in life. Moving overseas.
I was looking at housing prices in the LA (Calabasas) area and realized why. I only have about 5-7 more years before my kids are in their 20s and most likely on their own. If I were to purchase a 3 bedroom home now I would probably be upside down on it 5 years from now paying mostly interest to begin with and be worse off then renting. Not to mention I wouldn't need a 3 bedroom at that time anymore.
Then the thought occured to me. What about moving to Europe (even for a year or so)? So I brought this info to my wife and suddenly we were having a real discussion about it like it could actually happen. Of course I was talking about 8 years down the road but we were surprisingly open to the possibility of it being sooner if things happened that way (bringing our kids along with us). The funny part is that I'm not scared of it at all. So where would we move to?
I have always thought about retiring to Tuscany Italy (Around Florence area). Having a really cool base to travel wherever we wanted as well as living a simplier life in a foreign land. But I am not even thinking of retiring yet. So then I thought about France. Paris could work for my photography, however I would have to become stronger on my French speaking and my wife knows none of it. Strasbourg was an awesome place to visit and seemed like home- not to mention driving around to all the nearby wine towns was a neat experience. And they cater to English speakers much better so that may work as well. But if our kids go then we have to think about English speaking schools.
My other thoughts were of the UK and Ireland. I think London would not really be ideal as I wanted to be more in an old world atmosphere (and not a mega metropolis). If I wanted that I would simply go to NY instead. So that leaves me with Ireland- the home of my ancestors. Even though it's expensive as hell I could definitely see us living there.
What it all boils down to is a combination of where work would be and where we would want to go. Something I will have to do plenty of research on before it becomes fact. The cool part is- the dream has started.
I was looking at housing prices in the LA (Calabasas) area and realized why. I only have about 5-7 more years before my kids are in their 20s and most likely on their own. If I were to purchase a 3 bedroom home now I would probably be upside down on it 5 years from now paying mostly interest to begin with and be worse off then renting. Not to mention I wouldn't need a 3 bedroom at that time anymore.
Then the thought occured to me. What about moving to Europe (even for a year or so)? So I brought this info to my wife and suddenly we were having a real discussion about it like it could actually happen. Of course I was talking about 8 years down the road but we were surprisingly open to the possibility of it being sooner if things happened that way (bringing our kids along with us). The funny part is that I'm not scared of it at all. So where would we move to?
I have always thought about retiring to Tuscany Italy (Around Florence area). Having a really cool base to travel wherever we wanted as well as living a simplier life in a foreign land. But I am not even thinking of retiring yet. So then I thought about France. Paris could work for my photography, however I would have to become stronger on my French speaking and my wife knows none of it. Strasbourg was an awesome place to visit and seemed like home- not to mention driving around to all the nearby wine towns was a neat experience. And they cater to English speakers much better so that may work as well. But if our kids go then we have to think about English speaking schools.
My other thoughts were of the UK and Ireland. I think London would not really be ideal as I wanted to be more in an old world atmosphere (and not a mega metropolis). If I wanted that I would simply go to NY instead. So that leaves me with Ireland- the home of my ancestors. Even though it's expensive as hell I could definitely see us living there.
What it all boils down to is a combination of where work would be and where we would want to go. Something I will have to do plenty of research on before it becomes fact. The cool part is- the dream has started.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Painting With A Story
BROKEN
I am the shadow of my own creation. Scattered across the land searching to find the man I am supposed to be. Longing to be free from the chains of my mind to unwind the hands of time and somehow turn over this hourglass. But alas it’s no use. This world is too obtuse to understand the likes of me as I travel endlessly limping like an injured squirrel trying to cross the road. For this load that I bear is far greater than I ever feared. And that scares me to tears.
All my life I have searched for that one constant thought that would be my beginning. Instead I keep on sinking further into this quicksand of failures. I fear that I have endured far too much in this life that this strife I feel will forever keep me still. As I lose touch with all that is real.
Broken and shattered my mind tries to keep up with the beats of my heart, pulling me away from this infinite pain. But it runs too deep inside my veins that I am unable to get away from these thoughts that lead me astray.
The question is, “What’s stopping me”? The road is right there in front of me, to cross the path to uncertainty…
4-18-12
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
The Darkside of No Return
Sometimes I wonder if I am wasting my talents. I've always felt this need to put myself out there for others to see, whether through acting, writing, artwork or photography. The medium didn't matter as long as the message was clear. The problem is I have to put myself into a solemn place in order to stay in that creative state, and with a wife and two kids I pretty much try and close that part of my life off as much as possible.
I have come to realize that the hardest part of being an artist is not doing the work... but not allowing yourself to do it. It starts out to be practical reasons... but it soon turns into this immovable object that forces you into thinking in terms of reality. I guess that is why my passion for acting never seems to leave me. I miss having that outlet to let me feelings out. All the anger that I've felt.... love.... heartbreak..... bliss.... pain. I could stand in front of a camera or audience and read the given words but in the tone of my self pitty and I would simply lose myself. The icing on the cake is when others approached me after telling me how real it felt as I was doing the scene.
But this is not just about acting. Ever since I was a teenager I have used my creativity in this manner. Artwork was one way and playing basketball was another. Somehow when I stepped onto a court I could literally forget everything that I have thought of up until that point. There were no bills to worry about, appointments to schedule, people to please. It was just me.... my mind.... and the ball. My focus would be so strong that no matter how I played or shot... afterwards I was completely at ease in my thoughts. But now that has been taken away from me. This pain in my foot has been constant for over 3 months now and even though I have taken steps to help eleviate it... the swelling is still present.
Suddenly I am transported back to 14 years old when my dad told me I was too short physically and mentally to ever think I could play basketball. Only that time I had the drive to prove him wrong.
Even now, I have these ideas that pop ever so crazy into my skull that I almost feel like I have to do something about it before my head explodes. I have thought of writing a book or a script but I always give way. I've thought of throwing paint on a canvas and just go nuts with it... but the sensible side take over. I've even thought of going back to acting classes just to get my creative juices out of my system... but again, I reason myself out of it.
Perhaps I am just too lazy to finish what I start. I'd like to think that I am just so passionate about things that I can only continue on while I'm in the moment. Once it passes... then my reasons for completion do as well.
I am not afraid of what others think... as this is what I once thought of myself. I am actually more afraid of wanting to complete the task at hand so badly that I lose all sense of reality. I love my family with everything I have and the thought of putting anything in life ahead of them literally just kills me.
I have accepted the husband and dad role 100%. I have adapted to my lifestyle and happy with my vacation trips and time spent with my family while meagerly making my way through life. And I would never forgive myself if I ever did anything to throw all of that away. But that doesn't stop my heart from wanting to pour out it's darkest secrets to an audience willing to listen.
I have come to realize that the hardest part of being an artist is not doing the work... but not allowing yourself to do it. It starts out to be practical reasons... but it soon turns into this immovable object that forces you into thinking in terms of reality. I guess that is why my passion for acting never seems to leave me. I miss having that outlet to let me feelings out. All the anger that I've felt.... love.... heartbreak..... bliss.... pain. I could stand in front of a camera or audience and read the given words but in the tone of my self pitty and I would simply lose myself. The icing on the cake is when others approached me after telling me how real it felt as I was doing the scene.
But this is not just about acting. Ever since I was a teenager I have used my creativity in this manner. Artwork was one way and playing basketball was another. Somehow when I stepped onto a court I could literally forget everything that I have thought of up until that point. There were no bills to worry about, appointments to schedule, people to please. It was just me.... my mind.... and the ball. My focus would be so strong that no matter how I played or shot... afterwards I was completely at ease in my thoughts. But now that has been taken away from me. This pain in my foot has been constant for over 3 months now and even though I have taken steps to help eleviate it... the swelling is still present.
Suddenly I am transported back to 14 years old when my dad told me I was too short physically and mentally to ever think I could play basketball. Only that time I had the drive to prove him wrong.
Even now, I have these ideas that pop ever so crazy into my skull that I almost feel like I have to do something about it before my head explodes. I have thought of writing a book or a script but I always give way. I've thought of throwing paint on a canvas and just go nuts with it... but the sensible side take over. I've even thought of going back to acting classes just to get my creative juices out of my system... but again, I reason myself out of it.
Perhaps I am just too lazy to finish what I start. I'd like to think that I am just so passionate about things that I can only continue on while I'm in the moment. Once it passes... then my reasons for completion do as well.
I am not afraid of what others think... as this is what I once thought of myself. I am actually more afraid of wanting to complete the task at hand so badly that I lose all sense of reality. I love my family with everything I have and the thought of putting anything in life ahead of them literally just kills me.
I have accepted the husband and dad role 100%. I have adapted to my lifestyle and happy with my vacation trips and time spent with my family while meagerly making my way through life. And I would never forgive myself if I ever did anything to throw all of that away. But that doesn't stop my heart from wanting to pour out it's darkest secrets to an audience willing to listen.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Resolution
Not sure if I truly believe in a New Years resolution but if I did I guess this is how it would go.
Like every year I want my photography to keep growing. This year in 2011 I have made strides to increase sales for 2012 (including adding multiple locations where I could shoot). I had 3 location shoots the past few months and next year I plan to go full on with it.
Another one would have to be getting new headshots. Now that my hair is much longer than it ever was before I have to get them done. But doing them myself has been quite crazy as I need someone behind the camera to focus. Soon, I plan to get this done.
And that's it. Oh and World Peace!
Like every year I want my photography to keep growing. This year in 2011 I have made strides to increase sales for 2012 (including adding multiple locations where I could shoot). I had 3 location shoots the past few months and next year I plan to go full on with it.
Another one would have to be getting new headshots. Now that my hair is much longer than it ever was before I have to get them done. But doing them myself has been quite crazy as I need someone behind the camera to focus. Soon, I plan to get this done.
And that's it. Oh and World Peace!
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Photography is Bump'n
A few days ago I decided to make my own photography banner to advertise. LACasting has been updating my photos for me but sometimes I wonder if I put them to work too much by switching out photos and telling them what I wanted.
That was Friday. Since then I have booked 7 appointments in 2 days (all wanting to get in as soon as possible). And this is November which is normally my slow month.
I know it is too early to say but if this keeps up I will need to get a bigger studio.... and an assistant. Seriously though, I am very happy with the calls coming in but I am even happier with their reactions when they leave. They all say that they can't believe how patient I was and how I made them feel very at ease to get a natural smile or look from them. Not to mention how great I was working with their kids. Those kind of things make me feel very good about what I do.
As of today November 14th, I have surpassed my total from all of last year. Hopefully the trend will continue for 2012.
That was Friday. Since then I have booked 7 appointments in 2 days (all wanting to get in as soon as possible). And this is November which is normally my slow month.
I know it is too early to say but if this keeps up I will need to get a bigger studio.... and an assistant. Seriously though, I am very happy with the calls coming in but I am even happier with their reactions when they leave. They all say that they can't believe how patient I was and how I made them feel very at ease to get a natural smile or look from them. Not to mention how great I was working with their kids. Those kind of things make me feel very good about what I do.
As of today November 14th, I have surpassed my total from all of last year. Hopefully the trend will continue for 2012.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
My Left Foot
Shortly after returning from China about 5 weeks ago I woke up to a sharp pain in my left big toe. Initially I thought I twisted it somehow in my sleep and started to ice it down. But over the course of the next few days it got progressively worse with swelling. I started to do some research on the internet and came up with gout as the possible cause.
Immediately I started watching my caffeine intake and drink baking soda water and Apple Cidar vinegar. I also had to take ibuprofen every night before I went to bed otherwise I would wake up to a rude awakening. Two weeks go by and no change for the better. However I did start feeling lower back pain that eventually went to my neck. Okay now I am getting really frustrated. Not only can I not walk very well but I can't bend over or turn my head. Solution: more ibprofen. Not to mention my mom worried me about having diabeties. Thanks mom for that one. Also, I kept getting conflicting information from the internet as well from it being a nerve disorder to a sprain toe and even HIV. DUDE!!!!!
Finally I had enough. Last friday I checked around for a cheap doctor to go to (since I do not have insurance) and stumbled upon a practice for media, television and the arts. They asked if I had a SAG card and low and behold I did. They got me in immediately and ran tests with my blood and took xrays... all for only $25. I know!!!!!
Yesterday I get the news that everything is normal. Good to know that I do not have any life threatening disease but not good in the fact that I am back to square one. I did do some more research and found that even though it may not show up on an xray or blood sample that gout could still be present. So the past 2 days I have tried to drink as much water as possible in hopes of flushing this thing out.
I think I feel better but I won't know for sure until I am able to wake up in the morning without having to take ibuprofen the night before. I plan on waiting a few days before I try that again.
I am just hoping this thing gets resolved before Hawaii at the end of the month.
Immediately I started watching my caffeine intake and drink baking soda water and Apple Cidar vinegar. I also had to take ibuprofen every night before I went to bed otherwise I would wake up to a rude awakening. Two weeks go by and no change for the better. However I did start feeling lower back pain that eventually went to my neck. Okay now I am getting really frustrated. Not only can I not walk very well but I can't bend over or turn my head. Solution: more ibprofen. Not to mention my mom worried me about having diabeties. Thanks mom for that one. Also, I kept getting conflicting information from the internet as well from it being a nerve disorder to a sprain toe and even HIV. DUDE!!!!!
Finally I had enough. Last friday I checked around for a cheap doctor to go to (since I do not have insurance) and stumbled upon a practice for media, television and the arts. They asked if I had a SAG card and low and behold I did. They got me in immediately and ran tests with my blood and took xrays... all for only $25. I know!!!!!
Yesterday I get the news that everything is normal. Good to know that I do not have any life threatening disease but not good in the fact that I am back to square one. I did do some more research and found that even though it may not show up on an xray or blood sample that gout could still be present. So the past 2 days I have tried to drink as much water as possible in hopes of flushing this thing out.
I think I feel better but I won't know for sure until I am able to wake up in the morning without having to take ibuprofen the night before. I plan on waiting a few days before I try that again.
I am just hoping this thing gets resolved before Hawaii at the end of the month.
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